January

It was a yellow car that I saw as I was walking aimlessly ,

It was accelerating along the long stretch of road.

My thoughts were clouded as if rain was about to burst from the dark clouds,

music blasting through my ears in hope to vanish those thoughts, 

distracting me but everyone knew it wasn't sufficient enough.

I thought if I were to walk slightly to the right,

I would have reached my destination with the help of the yellow car,

but I had missed my chance.

or was I just being a coward?

I thought of how proud they would be if I were to do it,

how I would appear on a headline of a newspaper,

how people would gather to care how I was,

and how people would actually consider me as enough.

But, if only I did it,

Instead, I looked to my side,

twisting my head from left to right

to seek for a clear road to cross,

I ran seeing a car approaching me.

Believing my happy ending would come,

I decided to give another day a chance,

and once again being controlled by others. 

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Early January 2017.