First of all, happy new year or as snow would say it, Happy meow year (this does not make sense).
2018 was really a challenging year, it was one of the longest year despite it coming and ending in a swift. It really felt as if I was living in 2018 for two years.
In other words, 2018 was insanely tough. I learnt a lot of things about life, truth and friendship. It sure was tiring, 2019 feels like a year to recover from all that. The funny thing is, apart from getting older (I am old), I didn't feel anything as 2019 approached. I was pretty chill and not excited about it at all because part of me know that getting excited about it is probably a waste of time as things will turn down side again this year like any other year. Happiness is truly uncertain as tests in life drop like bombs.
A little highlight of 2018, I get to know really beautiful people whom I call friends. I was able to differentiate those who doesn't understand the meaning of friend (I reckon them to buy a dictionary) and duh, I met friends, friends who would go miles for me down the rocky road. Thanks to Pagoh (I really do not want to praise Pagoh), I got closer to my course mates, if it was not for Pagoh, I would probably be lone ranger like I was back then in Gombak. Anyways, they are a bunch of sweethearts, really. I am thankful for them, so blessed.
I went through almost three months of internship and met more people. I was pushed to go beyond my comfort zone and I am thankful to my supervisor and her executives for that, for always giving me endless support even when I am dumb.
Two of my siblings got married and yay, I have a new brother and a sister. Not thrill about it at first cause I love my my siblings too much, it was hard letting them go (Clingy, I know. They're equally clingy too). Thanks to my their wedding, I get to practice more of my management skills.
Speaking of that, 2018 is the year I joined loads of programs, I almost died from lack of sleep, being sick and also late night meetings. I was given the chance to co-lead a team and boy, I was blessed with the best team. Our team was somehow supervised by a strict lecturer, who was really strict back then, I was so scared of her that I attended all of her classes but she had taught me a lot by being herself. Thank you for the opportunity, madam. I was also, initially was under a supervisor for my final year project but because I had no progress (there were complications) and probably I was not as committed as the rest, I was let go. She's a really great lecturer, who had shown me so much love (and darn everyone who booked her as well cause you took my supposedly spot, hehe). Although it was not exactly a rejection, I cried for two days and currently, still bitter because I wanted to be under her supervision so bad. Maybe, there's a silver lining.
I went to the hospital once in every two months, knowing the truth about my behaviour and myself. I am glad I know myself better, in a way. I am grateful I have supportive family, especially my parents and my sister who were always there to keep tabs on me, also my friends who reacted as if nothing happens cause, I just need to feel normal and not defined by what is said about me. It was a crazy August 2018, there were a lot of blood, more than usual but I have a lot of people with me. I am fine.
I went travelling pretty frequent in 2018.
Basically, 2018 taught me love, one taught me has taught me a lot, it was truly a year of learning. Through betrayal and beautiful friendships, self-enhancement through programs and events, supportive humans who made me wanting to die less (and slightly guilty of killing myself and omg, don't want to end up in neraka).
2019, what can you offer?
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